Accepting The Ebb & Flow
Microfeminist action and the confidence to just say no
Hello again from Hysterical Health!
I’m sheepishly reappearing in your inbox after another unplanned hiatus, leading me to the focus for this month’s edition: acceptance. More specifically, the type of self-acceptance that you build when you start to understand your menstrual cycle.
I say ‘build’ because it’s not something that appears overnight. Even now, after years of learning about my body’s patterns, I still find myself getting frustrated when things don’t go to plan…
Energy shifts & setting boundaries
Someone recently described the menstrual cycle as ‘the ebb and flow of energy’.
To me, that phrase perfectly captures the multifaceted nature of the menstrual cycle: as both a source of power and vulnerability.
There are times when our hormones make us feel alive with that electric flow, and others when they force us to slow down and reflect.
Recognising this shift in energy helps me to set boundaries with others in ways I hadn’t previously. I’d even go as far as to say it’s given me a new level of confidence (a big deal for a chronic people-pleaser).
Microfeminism in action
A while back, I spoke on LinkedIn about microfeminism - a TikTok trend based on the idea that positive change starts with small, intentional daily gestures.
These could be refusing to step aside for a man in the street, or automatically referring to a CEO as ‘she’ when their gender is unknown.
My favourite microfeminism is telling people I’m on my period.
To me, it’s a small but important step toward normalising periods in everyday conversation. If I need to cancel plans or call in sick, I’ll say why. Even when it’s easier to lie and blame a headache, even when it makes me uncomfortable.
It’s not always easy - I still hesitate sometimes.
Just the other day at my cafe job, my boss asked me why I needed ibuprofen in front of an entire kitchen of male staff. After just a moment’s pause, I blurted out ‘for my period’.
The colour drained from his face and he apologised in an instant, offering to run to the pharmacy for me. I smiled and told him there was no need to be sorry but I absolutely would appreciate that kindness. He returned with those top-shelf branded painkillers.
It’s easy to minimise that interaction on reflection - but in the moment, it felt like a mammoth achievement to speak up and be honest in the face of discomfort.
Stigma thrives in silence and discomfort - but every time we force ourselves to be honest about what our bodies are going through, that stigma loses some of its power.
Self-acceptance: not just for the ebbs
I recently learned that self-acceptance isn’t just for the low-energy phases of my menstrual cycle. You’d be surprised just how many treats I can justify during my late-luteal phase.
But a couple of weeks ago, I was struck down by the cold from hell. The worst part wasn’t feeling like I had a tiny gremlin punching me behind the eyes. It was the fact that this illness fell directly during my ovulation phase - the phase I look forward to all month.
This hits particularly hard for anyone self-employed. We have the luxury of adjusting our work schedules to fit our energy levels but sometimes life just doesn’t go to plan.
Ovulation is usually THE time for me to get sh*t done. I’m energised, I’m social, I’m hot. But not this time around. Those work projects and social events I’d pushed back during my period week? Simply not happening.
It can be frustrating when you feel like you’re just starting to get a grasp on your cycle, only for it to throw you a curve ball. As I took to LinkedIn to moan about my predicament, my lovely network was quick to point out:
Women’s health isn’t one-size-fits-all.
Yes, you’re likely to have different strengths during different phases of your cycle. No, that likelihood isn’t set in stone.
Our cycles are individual. They can be unpredictable.
It’s a journey of constant shift and change - the ebb and flow of energy.
We deserve room and compassion to accommodate those changes. So now, I’m working on building that self-acceptance throughout all stages of my cycle, not just the most typically challenging.
What’s next?
Look out for next month’s edition where I interview Sheila, a newly-qualified menstrual educator. We’ll be talking body literacy, fertility awareness and all things cervical mucus - no shyness here!
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